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I spend a lot of time talking about and thinking about the myth of having it all. I also sometimes spend a lot of time writing about that same topic. For me, it’s a hard topic – I want to encourage women to forge ahead, to lean in and feel as if they have options and choices. At the same time that I want to encourage others, I don’t want to set them up to fail by believing that we can indeed have it all at the same time.

I worry because I know that I’m the first one to beat myself up when I think I’m failing, even if I’m just failing my own ideal. And I know I’m not alone. I know that there are moms out there who are going to bed thinking that they should have done one more load of laundry, read one more email or made those cookies instead of going to the store.

Some days we have to let somethings slip. Sometimes, something has to slip for months. But one thing I’ve learned is that sometimes how you find out what things really matter – not the big things, because hopefully those are the ones that you don’t let slip – but the little things that make life seem lighter, give you a moment of pause or a laugh.

In 2016, I’m trying to refocus to add more of those back in. Here’s my to do list for bringing back sanity:

  • Learn the steps to that song on Teen Beach Movie 2 so I can beat my 5 year old at Just Dance Disney;
  • Recognize the battles that aren’t worth my energy — battles I’ve already won or battles that just don’t need to be fought. And rather than pick up my armor, I’ll pick up my yoga mat and head to a class;
  • Find a battle that needs fighting, that deserves attention and focus on it;
  • Stop looking for battles and instead play Barbies, because I’m thinking it would be kinda fun to be the Pop-star/Scientist/President/Mom that somehow runs from stage to lab to a ball.

How do you recapture your sanity? Or are you like me and usually only get to imagine what that must feel like.

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Cathleen Lewis
Cathleen, the Mayor of Lawrence Township & a full-time Public Affairs professional, counts her best job as being Mommy to Abigail (3 years) and Bridget (6 months ). A New Yorker originally, but Boston raised, Cathleen enjoys the challenge of raising the girls in a mixed household with her Yankee-fan husband Paul. She hopes to make up for the confusion by encouraging the family’s love of Rutgers football. She dreams of sharing her love of beaches, margaritas, music and adventure but is happy to squeeze in a family walk with the dog and a back yard BBQ these days. Formerly an avid reader and writer before work, life and children; Cathleen hopes she hasn’t lost her ability to capture thoughts through the written word but often can’t remember where the grocery list is.

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